At 4 o’clock in the afternoon on Thursday, February 24, 2011, my husband Matt and I had just picked up our 6-year-old son, Grayson, from school. Climbing back into our car, I scrambled to grab my ringing cell phone. It was Michelle, my children’s stepmother. She hurriedly informed me that Celeste, my 12-year-old daughter, was in the emergency department of the Children’s Hospital in London, Ontario.
Celeste had been having bad headaches, and we had a doctor’s appointment coming, but when she started developing double vision that morning, Michelle, a neurology resident, took Celeste to see her doctor that day. He immediately sent Celeste over to the emergency department. They did a CAT scan and an MRI was scheduled.
Michelle announced, “Celeste has to have emergency neuro [brain] surgery tonight.”
“We’re on our way!” I said. I was in shock.
Celeste ended up having two surgeries in seven days. She was transferred to Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto. Then ten days later she was diagnosed with Pineoblastoma, a very rare form of brain tumour. It was recommended that she begin 30 treatments of high dose radiation and 4 rounds of high dose chemotherapy and stem cell rescue.
We later found out there was one other 12 year-old girl, Hayley, in New Jersey undergoing the exact same protocol at the same time. She had also been diagnosed that same February. We couldn’t believe our luck finding someone else who was going through the same things at the same time. Hayley’s mom, Laurie and I became closer than close that year as we emailed and called each other, sometimes daily. We watched our girls bravely go through the most difficult treatments, tests, surgeries and procedures imaginable. We watched them amaze their doctors and nurses and bounce back incredibly. Hayley received the coveted “No Evidence of Disease” and Celeste’s tumour shrank 98.5 percent. That year they both returned back to school, graduated from grade 8 and moved up to high school. It was incredible. They were incredible.
We learned to believe in miracles that year. I, personally was intent on discovering the secret to obtaining as many miracles as possible for Celeste. I had enough faith and determination to do everything in my power so my beautiful daughter would conquer these stupid cells in her body. I knew they were only cells in the wrong place, growing where they shouldn’t, just a small task for Heavenly Father to take care of. I knew we would have the miracle we were praying for.
I learned so much that year that I began teaching what faith really is all about: believing, listening, trusting, and acting. I believe in a God of miracles. I was willing to listen to the prompting I received from God, trust those promptings and act by following through on the inspiration I received. This wasn’t hard. Every day I was practicing my faith: believing, listening, trusting and acting. I knew we could remain positive through it all and inspire others on how to bravely get through similar challenges.
What I didn’t know was Heavenly Father’s plan for Celeste.
During the summer of 2012, Celeste’s MRI showed some spots that hadn’t been there before. Others had reported similar early MRIs showing new spots but they ended up being nothing or were gone on the next MRI. We prayed that would be the case with Celeste. But in those first few days after hearing the news, I was overcome with the fear of losing her.
What if? I couldn’t bear the thought.
I rededicated myself to doing everything to help her return to full health. I prayed and focused on seeing her healthy and happy. I asked everyone we knew to refocus and keep praying for her full recovery. I studied Wayne Dyer’s book The Power of Intention. I continued to ask my Heavenly Father and I was ready to receive answers, blessings, and miracles.
I was willing to do everything necessary to help Celeste. Although the medical system didn’t have anything else left to offer, there were still many more options available alternatively. I knew prayer was the greatest tool we had too.
But I realized that ultimately it was up to Celeste and what she wanted.
It was her fight, not mine.
She’s the one in the ring. It was her choice and not mine. If Celeste wanted to live, then I would help in every way possible. But if she didn’t have the energy left to fight this anymore, then I would support her in that as well.
We would focus on helping her to live the best way possible with the time she had remaining and make every day fantastic!
This was the hardest thing to do, but it was what gave me the most peace. It was the ultimate letting go and the greatest test of my faith. I learned to trust completely. Then when the news came on her next MRI that the tumours had spread everywhere and she only had days or weeks left to live, we knew what we needed to do. Make every day she had left incredible!
The last 6 weeks we spent with Celeste was the biggest and most wonderful miracle we could receive. With the assistance of hundreds of people all over the world we helped Celeste complete her bucket list. We were able to beautifully prepare her for her transition to her Heavenly Father with ease and grace. She quietly passed over to the other side minutes before noon on February 24th 2013.
Even though it was difficult I was able to hold onto an incredible sense of peace knowing everything was as it should be, we had done everything we could for her and she was in much better place. I embraced the beautiful words I received from Elder David Homer “Sometimes there are spirits so sweet and so special, God has to call them home.” My dear sweet daughter had been called home and it was okay.
Laura Lane
Laura Lane has worked, trained with and learned from the world’s leaders in personal growth and development: Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Chris and Janet Attwood, Marci Schimoff, Steve Siebold, Stephen Covey, Kevin Hall, Ty Bennett, Dave Blanchard, and Wayne Dyer. She is a published children’s book author, poet, artist, speaker, coach and gallery owner. Laura Lane and Laurie Nersten have co-authored the book “Two Mothers, One Prayer: Facing your child’s cancer with hope, strength and courage” sharing the courageous stories of their daughters, the beautiful relationship that developed between the two mothers and what they learned through their experiences that could help and inspire other parents. It is a story of love and loss, of hope, strength and courage, written to touch the readers heart no matter your circumstance.
In support of Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, “Two Mothers, One Prayer” is very excited to partner with Bob Proctor and the Insight of the Day community in donating $5 from every sale to the Sick Kids Hospital Foundation. Enter “CCAM – Sick Kids” in the comments when placing your order. www.twomothersoneprayer.com
